Chris Matthews, that fearless leader of MSNBC intelligence gathering and underground resistance, staunch protector against pasty white people, and wielder of epithets against Republican conventioneers
, has managed to crack the racist code.
Yes, no longer can Republicans slyly and knowingly exchange glances when they use words like...(cue Vader music)...."Chicago"...."Golf"..."Welfare"...Alas, our evil has been undone.
Please read Mark Steyn's great piece
for further explanation.
Since Republican Racist Code (RRC) has been outed, it's time to come clean and reveal our full list of code. Curse you Chris Matthews! Here is your list of code and their hidden meanings:
1. "Obama" -- Barack Obama is black. Therefore when we say, "Obama", one thinks of a black man and therein lies the sinister use of the word.
2. "Biden" -- This code makes one think of blacks in chains and conjures words like, "y'all". Curse you, again, Chris Matthews!
3. "Pelosi" -- This word simply means, "keep the black man down." How its meaning is derived would require ten pages of detail! Arrrrrgh...Curse you, Chris Matthews!
4. "Yahoo" -- When we utter this word, we wink and smile and picture black people drowning
. And we particularly love how it also describes our great pleasure at that sight of it! Yahoo!!
5. "Romney" -- Romney means white guy who hates black guys. Thus, we all say it and nod in agreement.
6. "Election" -- Election makes people think that we are going to the polls soon to elect our president. When people think of our president, they think of a black man. Hence, "election" means black man. Curse you, again, Chris Matthews!
7. "Economy" -- our economy is bad. Black people are bad. So...there ya go.
8. "Ryan" -- Paul Ryan is white. He is conservative. This code gives us inner-peace and strength.
9. "I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice looking guy"
-- This makes us think of what Biden said about Obama and we can then incorporate three of our codes into one turn of phrase -- oh it was brilliant.
10. "Chris Mathews" -- Pasty and white. Two things we love so dearly.
As a post-script, if you check out the link here which refers to Matthews shouting match with Republican conventioneers at the top of the page, you'll find that the word he chose to hurl at those in his path was not a very nice word at all -- it begins with "d" and ends with "bag". We don't need a code to crack that insult to women do we? Where are the women's groups??