Buttcrack or B.O.?

Remember the good old days when the plumber went under the sink and revealed the iconic cleavage of the gluteus? How I miss those days. Yesterday we had a plumber in the house for a number of jobs completed over a number of hours. He possessed the odor that only a Seinfeldian Valet could match. He had been there the day before on the initial consultation, so when I saw him coming, I prophylactically opened the windows and got the fans running.
Sweet guy from the Ukraine. . .you couldn't really say anything to him. . .I think we got it all cleared out, but. . if the smell of my daughter's hair chases away her boyfriend. . .we'll readily identify the culprit.